Simply K

Forget the French vineyards and Italian grape stomps—wine’s true origin story starts in China. Around 7000 BC, in the Neolithic Yangshao culture of Henan, someone left a clay jar of rice, honey, and hawthorn berries lying about. Wild yeast gate-crashed, got drunk on sugar, and—ta-da—the world’s first booze was born. Archaeologists found the residue, which is basically the ancient equivalent of sticky bar floors.

By the Shang Dynasty (1600–1046 BC), wine wasn’t just accidental; it was official state business.. Bronze vats bigger than hot tubs were dug up—used to serve alcohol to ancestors & guests. Imagine inviting your dead grandma to dinner and thinking, “better bring another keg.”

Then came the Zhou Dynasty (1046–256 BC), where wine was woven into rituals, politics, and excessive feasting. Chinese texts even complained that court officials were hammered on the job. Congratulations, ancient China—you invented both wine and HR problems..

By the Han Dynasty (206 BC–220 AD), things really leveled up. Thanks to the Silk Road, grapevines & winemaking techniques made their way in from Central Asia. Suddenly China had grape wine alongside their fruit-and-rice brews. It was globalization before globalization.

And Europe? They showed up late to the party. The earliest solid evidence of winemaking in the Caucasus region (modern Georgia) dates back to 6000 BC, but wine didn’t really strut into the Mediterranean spotlight until much later—thanks to those same Silk Road and trade routes. By around 2000–1000 BC, grape wine had made its way west, where the Greeks elevated it to a god (literally, Dionysus), and the Romans industrialized it with vineyards, barrels, and binge-drinking festivals that make Oktoberfest look tame.

So the truth is this: China discovered the recipe, Central Asia spread the grape gospel, and Europe turned it into a cultural identity. From ancestor offerings to Roman orgies, all because some Neolithic villager didn’t throw out spoiled rice juice.

Next time someone swirls a Bordeaux and mutters about “terroir,” remind them that wine is 9,000 years of humans refusing to pour out dodgy leftovers.